tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post2284179961485748377..comments2024-03-19T08:40:36.481+11:00Comments on Life with Aspergers: Calming Techniques for the Special Needs ChildGavin Bollardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13833941398375568706noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-31368641688599169642012-07-25T14:11:40.289+10:002012-07-25T14:11:40.289+10:00I have two more to add to your list. I find it oft...I have two more to add to your list. I find it often helps to "value the child's communication" also. When dealing with a meltdown just this morning, I got my whiteboard and wrote down verbatim everything the child was saying so he could see me and the words (whether it made any sense to me or not) and calmly repeated/read the words he'd said. He started to calm immediately and paid attention to what I was writing. Soon I was able to add the words I needed to say to the board (no hitting please, find a safe seat, drink water, work is gone, etc.) and he was able to process the written words/visual and get himself regulated again. I have used this technique a number of times with various children and it is usually effective. Children need to feel that their communications are valued. I also find that if I write down whatever the child says (and some of it may be jibberish), sprinkled in amongst all the words is usually the real problem that the child was unable to verbalize to me so I'm actually able to analyze what has caused the difficulty in order to problem solve. With a nonverbal child, I draw pictures (not good ones, but they seem to be adequate) to do the same thing. Depending on the child, I may or may not add written words to my pictures. I'm not sure why this works so well...I think it's a combination of distracting the child and the child realizing that his communication is valued, plus the fact that the child knows I'm trying to help him solve it. These kids are actually amazingly accepting of our ignorance when you think about it. Another thing I do early on with any child is I observe and note what his "self-regulators" are and then I employ them to help him to calm down. A child in meltdown usually cannot think about how to calm down so I've found if I can employ self regulating techniques, then the child can gradually take over and calm himself. For example, self regulating techniques are usually rhythmical and repetitious (flapping hands, chewing, flipping pages in a book, drinking sips of water, tapping, etc.). When I had a child in meltdown once, I just calmly sat beside him, grabbed a book, and started turning the pages because I knew that was a self-regulator he used. Within a few short minutes, he sat up, grabbed the book and started turning the pages himself. A few minutes later, the meltdown was over. These are just two more strategies to add to your repertoire which have worked for me: value the communication and identify how the child self-regulates so you can employ that when needed.mmyersslphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11477459787629885780noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-88954297564920500522012-07-25T14:11:09.910+10:002012-07-25T14:11:09.910+10:00I have two more to add to your list. I find it oft...I have two more to add to your list. I find it often helps to "value the child's communication" also. When dealing with a meltdown just this morning, I got my whiteboard and wrote down verbatim everything the child was saying so he could see me and the words (whether it made any sense to me or not) and calmly repeated/read the words he'd said. He started to calm immediately and paid attention to what I was writing. Soon I was able to add the words I needed to say to the board (no hitting please, find a safe seat, drink water, work is gone, etc.) and he was able to process the written words/visual and get himself regulated again. I have used this technique a number of times with various children and it is usually effective. Children need to feel that their communications are valued. I also find that if I write down whatever the child says (and some of it may be jibberish), sprinkled in amongst all the words is usually the real problem that the child was unable to verbalize to me so I'm actually able to analyze what has caused the difficulty in order to problem solve. With a nonverbal child, I draw pictures (not good ones, but they seem to be adequate) to do the same thing. Depending on the child, I may or may not add written words to my pictures. I'm not sure why this works so well...I think it's a combination of distracting the child and the child realizing that his communication is valued, plus the fact that the child knows I'm trying to help him solve it. These kids are actually amazingly accepting of our ignorance when you think about it. Another thing I do early on with any child is I observe and note what his "self-regulators" are and then I employ them to help him to calm down. A child in meltdown usually cannot think about how to calm down so I've found if I can employ self regulating techniques, then the child can gradually take over and calm himself. For example, self regulating techniques are usually rhythmical and repetitious (flapping hands, chewing, flipping pages in a book, drinking sips of water, tapping, etc.). When I had a child in meltdown once, I just calmly sat beside him, grabbed a book, and started turning the pages because I knew that was a self-regulator he used. Within a few short minutes, he sat up, grabbed the book and started turning the pages himself. A few minutes later, the meltdown was over. These are just two more strategies to add to your repertoire which have worked for me: value the communication and identify how the child self-regulates so you can employ that when needed.mmyersslphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11477459787629885780noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-17790821713092831622012-02-18T06:13:50.061+11:002012-02-18T06:13:50.061+11:00Reading your pages on meldown and shutdowns has op...Reading your pages on meldown and shutdowns has opened my eyes. I'm undiagnosed, but I have a very strong suspect of being an Aspie (on the test you suggest I scored 124 once then 116 another time, not very high but still above 100).<br />I did not know that meltdowns and shutdowns where also part of the symptoms, I had both as a child, I have them occasionally now, and reading your blog has been a revelation.<br />As a child I had major episodes of crying desperately and screaming, "you cried so much that your father had to stop the car and slapped you untill HE calmed down", as my maternal grandmother put it. I usually cried untill I sort of collapsed and went to sleep. I sometime "escaped" under the bed or into corners (once I closed myself in a cupboard) as enclose spaces make me feel safe and protected. My parents approach to my "being a nasty child" was shouting and sometime slapping me, then, especially my mom, trying to hug me to make peace. They really did not know what to do, in general I was a quiet girl, a "little scientist",with many interests (one at a time....all what you can read on dinsaurs, then collecting minerals and fossils, then reading all the medical enciclopedia, etc etc) They thought that my occasional weirdness(es) derived from being an "only child", a somewhat exotic creature where I grow up...<br /> <br />I wanted to stop crying, I wanted to stop feeling utterly miserable, they thougth I was being a stubborn, horrible child. I tended to "melt" just before or after important events, if I was worried about something or tired then small things could precipitate me into becoming a screaming little horror...<br />I wish pages like this were there 35 years ago, I really wish. Nowadays I'm rather happily living as "NT" but I do suffer from depression, and low self estime. And sometime I panic for silly things. And I do have rage issues, I get a red fog and then need to kick things, or punch walls, it's sometime pretty out of proportion to the triggering problem, it just seems too much, the pain from hitting things seems to help getting me back to the planet. And yes, now I'm limping because one of hte things I hit happened to be a very solid and heavvy firedoor..Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-26251973062211634912011-09-30T08:51:10.978+10:002011-09-30T08:51:10.978+10:00@Bronwyn; by all means share away.@Bronwyn; by all means share away.Gavin Bollardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13833941398375568706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-61383080350012542362011-09-28T08:14:21.457+10:002011-09-28T08:14:21.457+10:00What a fantastic article! I think having multiple ...What a fantastic article! I think having multiple techniques in our tool kit is essential. Thank you for sharing them all.<br /><br />I have a blophop for parents of children (and older people) with Autism (including Aspergers & PDDNOS). I would love to share your insightful posts with my readers. http://www.athomemum.com/LifeOnTheSpectrumBronwynhttp://www.athomemum.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-89373665875495203482011-09-18T12:34:27.046+10:002011-09-18T12:34:27.046+10:00Great suggestions! Thanks!Great suggestions! Thanks!martiannehttp://traininghappyhearts.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-7456119765346568272011-09-12T17:59:11.069+10:002011-09-12T17:59:11.069+10:00Indeed a good article. :)
I've been going thr...Indeed a good article. :)<br /><br />I've been going through panic attacks from time to time. My mom game me breathing techniques which calmed me down a bit. Trying to remain tranquil through the toughest situations is also a big deal for me...evedwardshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02834990533776705783noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-86016747502010032342011-09-12T14:44:08.474+10:002011-09-12T14:44:08.474+10:00Gavin, what a great list of techniques. Thanks for...Gavin, what a great list of techniques. Thanks for sharing all of them!Danettehttp://sos-research-blog.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4841851020927689161.post-61515260194442339982011-09-10T16:55:27.568+10:002011-09-10T16:55:27.568+10:00Thank you, this is very practical and really makes...Thank you, this is very practical and really makes sense to the situations we find ourselves in.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com