Much has been said about aspies & feelings and aspies being able to tolerate higher amounts of pain. I don't think I've gone into either topic in any real depth yet.
In short, Aspies aren't supermen and superwomen... They can be hurt and often are in pain, whether it shows on their faces or not. They just complain about it less than some people I guess.
Emotional Pain
While it's true that sometimes an aspie will lack empathy and won't feel anything for a given situation. I'll discuss that in a later post (sorry). It isn't true to say that the feelings of aspies can't be hurt. They can. Sometimes the aspie will show a reaction to their hurt feelings and sometimes they'll lash out. More often though, aspies will simply remain silent and impassive despite internal turmoil.
Physical Pain
Wouldn't it be wonderful to be in a world without physical pain? Everyone feels pain to some degree - including aspies. It doesn't have to be a huge pain to be felt, a paper cut or scraped knees will always bring tears out in an aspie child.
So where does the "no-pain" idea fit in?
Aspies are very good at ignoring pain, particularly if they're engaged in their special interest. The sorts of pain most commonly "ignored" by aspies are things such as muscular/nervous pain, rather than wounds. Although wounds can also be ignored.
Why is this a problem?
Pain is our body's way of telling us to stop what we're doing and have a rest or seek medical assistance.
You can imagine the long term effects of ignoring a toothache or a muscular/nerve problem like RSI.
In fact, I can speak firsthand about the RSI problem, since I have it. It's strange, when I go to physio for my injured hands, it hurts when they work on them. I take my mind off the hurt but then they ask me whether I can feel "this" (as they squeeze a nerve or something) all the way down my arm to my hand. I can't tell them and it takes a little while to become "switched on" to the pain again.
It's not that the pain is gone, just dulled.
In short, Aspies aren't supermen and superwomen... They can be hurt and often are in pain, whether it shows on their faces or not. They just complain about it less than some people I guess.
Emotional Pain
While it's true that sometimes an aspie will lack empathy and won't feel anything for a given situation. I'll discuss that in a later post (sorry). It isn't true to say that the feelings of aspies can't be hurt. They can. Sometimes the aspie will show a reaction to their hurt feelings and sometimes they'll lash out. More often though, aspies will simply remain silent and impassive despite internal turmoil.
Physical Pain
Wouldn't it be wonderful to be in a world without physical pain? Everyone feels pain to some degree - including aspies. It doesn't have to be a huge pain to be felt, a paper cut or scraped knees will always bring tears out in an aspie child.
So where does the "no-pain" idea fit in?
Aspies are very good at ignoring pain, particularly if they're engaged in their special interest. The sorts of pain most commonly "ignored" by aspies are things such as muscular/nervous pain, rather than wounds. Although wounds can also be ignored.
Why is this a problem?
Pain is our body's way of telling us to stop what we're doing and have a rest or seek medical assistance.
You can imagine the long term effects of ignoring a toothache or a muscular/nerve problem like RSI.
In fact, I can speak firsthand about the RSI problem, since I have it. It's strange, when I go to physio for my injured hands, it hurts when they work on them. I take my mind off the hurt but then they ask me whether I can feel "this" (as they squeeze a nerve or something) all the way down my arm to my hand. I can't tell them and it takes a little while to become "switched on" to the pain again.
It's not that the pain is gone, just dulled.
Comments
I walked home and went to bed. When my family saw my wound the next morning they made me go to the hospital and I had surgery.
I think you're getting "pain tolerance" and "sensory issues" confused.
Aspies often but not always have high thresholds of pain tolerance. I'm referring to physical pain, cuts, bruises and headaches.
Paradoxically, they often (but again, not always) have high levels of sensory intolerance.
The sensory intolerance tends to mean that certain types of senses cause severe discomfort.
You may find that a tight hug is well received but that a light touch is not.
Hair brushing is a common sensory issue.
On the flip side, he doesn't seem to understand what causes other people pain. If I am playing with him and his sister 9typically tickling) he may come at me with a baseball bat. Not because he's angry, but because he thinks it's fun. His special interest at the moments is weapons. Recently, he has been spreading the violent behavior towards others to the dog. She a really big dog and so some of us tend to play with her roughly. But my cousin takes it to a whole different level, things that are just downright mean.
We've told him he is not aloud to hit other people or things, and that it is not funny. (he seems to think it is) But I honestly don't think he perceives what he is doing as something that would cause pain. Any suggestions on how we might help him to understand why it is wrong so that we can stop the behavior?
Your cousin is on dangerous ground at the moment if he doesn't recognise what causes other people pain - and if he special interest is weapons.
It's good that you're looking at ways to teach him because the next few years are crucial.
I don't really know what the best way forward is.
Whenever my youngest son is seen to be harming a person, he goes into time out - and we explain how it hurts. Whenever he's hurting an animal (usually by loving it - squeezing it - too much) we ban him from interactions with the animal for a day or two.
I'm not sure how effective this is but since he doesn't have an interest in weaponry, it's not so critical.
In your cousin's case, he might benefit from some professional help.
In reality a lack of empathy is really quite common among those with Asperger's. That YOU do not exhibit the trait simply means that YOU do not exhibit the trait. I do, as do the majority of those within our tiny little portion of the spectrum.
One of the pitfalls of Asperger's syndrome is that it isn't a 'thing' that people have, it is a wide array of traits, all of which are linked in some way to the syndrome that Hans Asperger identified.
Not all humans are right-handed, but lacking right-handedness does not make a person any less human.
As they say, once you've met one Aspie, you've met one Aspie...
Regards -
So when they tell me at the dentist office it won't hurt, I know it just might hurt - a lot, and when my kickboxing instructor told me this hurts, I knew I'd barely feel it. It can get confusing.