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Showing posts from October, 2009

Why Do Aspies Suddenly Back-Off in Relationships? (Part 1)

One of the most frequent questions I'm asked is why an aspie (or suspected aspie) suddenly goes "cold" and backs off on an otherwise good relationship.
It's a difficult question and the answers would vary considerably from one person to another and would depend greatly on the circumstances. Nevertheless, I'll try to point out some possibilities.
Negative Reasons I generally like to stay positive on this blog and assume that people are not necessarily "evil" but simply misguided. Unfortunately, I do have to acknowledge that there are some people out there who take advantage of others.
I read a book a few years ago on "sociopaths in the workplace" and I was stunned by the figures. They suggested that sociopaths were so common that most workplaces (small business) had at least one or two.
The fact is that there are lots of people out there who really feel very little for others and who are very manipulative. I'd like to say that aspies aren't …

Book: The Perfect Gift for a Man (Released Today!)

Ok, I'll admit up front that this post is a shameless plug but it's for a good cause.

The Book Long-time readers of this blog may recall that recently, a group of Australian bloggers, myself included, participated in a "man-week" exercise designed to heighten awareness and acceptability of emotions in men.
The man-week initiative resulted in a book containing 30 stories by Australian men, myself included. Some of the material was on various blogs during man-week and some is new.
You can visit the web site for the book at;
The book is available for purchase as softcover or ebook and all proceeds from the book are going to the Inspire Foundation in an effort to reduce the suicide rates among men.
Men and Emotions Men in our society, and particularly men in Australia are often raised to be the "rock of the family" and our emotions are supressed at an early age.
I can remember being quite young and having been hurt quite badly..…

How can a positive diagnosis of Asperger's help an already established adult?

There's no question about it, the majority of Asperger's diagnosis' handed out today go to children. It is also pretty clear that the diagnosis provides access to a lot of ongoing early intervention and is the most successful way of dealing with the problems condition poses.
Some time ago I asked whether or not it made sense to label our children. Although the answers were far from unanimous, the majority seemed to support the label. This was because in most cases, a diagnosis provided obvious benefits.
It's a fairly simple question when aimed at children but it becomes a very different question when aimed at adults. It's difficult to tell whether or not a diagnosis can be useful for an adult who has already become well-established in the world, though not necessarily successful.
A Lack of Obvious Benefits For a start, the obvious benefits just aren't there. There generally aren't any government handouts for adults with aspergers and revealing your conditio…

News: Stunning Examples of Autistic Child Abuse

In the news today is an article with some of the worst examples of autistic child abuse I've ever heard of.
Special Education Teachers in Trouble for Autistic Student Abuse
Now I know that there are worse things being done to autistic children (see Observations and Findings of Out-of-State Program Visitation Judge Rotenberg Educational Center) but the difference is that it's fairly obvious what the programme at the JRE is. The abuse reported today was being committed by trusted special education teachers.
If you put your child into a center like JRE, you will (hopefully) have checked the place out and have made a conscious decision to treat the child in that manner. I'm not saying that it's a good thing - far from it - but parents who institutionalise their children should have very good reasons and more importantly, they should feel responsible for supervising their child's t…

Book Review: Raising a Left-Brain Child in a Right-Brain World

I'd always intended to do some book reviews on "Life with Aspergers" and since I was sent the following book to review, it seems a good place to start.
Raising a Left-Brain Child in a Right-Brain World Strategies for Helping Bright, Quirky, Socially Awkward Children to Thrive at Home and at School. by Katharine Beals PhD.

Initial Response On the face of it, the title of this book would probably not engage my interest - which is unfortunate because it's a really fascinating book. The title isn't wrong either, the book really is about "Left-Brained Children"; it's just that you need a bit more explanation before you read the title.
The Left Brained Child Katharine Beals has used the label "Left-Brained" in place of other more judgemental labels. She describes the left brained child as the sort of child to whom mathematics comes easy and group work does not. Her definition is quite encompassing but if I have any issues with the book, they're s…

The Aspie Senses - Part 2

Last time I started discussing how senses affect our perception and I looked at hearing which is my weakest sense, and smell which is my second weakest. For me, even these "weaker" senses mix with memories and provoke both positive and negative emotions. In this post, I'll continue the exploration of the senses;

Taste In my case, taste is the weakest Of the remaining three senses. I know that many people believe in more, in fact, so do I but for the moment, I'm sticking to the classical five. My sense of taste has always been fine but there is such a strong link between taste and smell that my impaired sense of smell obviously affects taste.
There are only two food tastes which I severely dislike; Sultanas and Orange Vegetable (Carrots, Pumpkin and sweet potato). Sultana's are easily the worst affecting me in several other ways, including touch, sight and smell. I can't look at them. I can't eat things that have been stored in the same containers as th…

Colour Changes

Just as a side note, I've received a lot of complaints about my white text on a black background - so I changed to black text on a white background - and got a complaint about that on the first day.
I'm not particularly excited about the black text on parchment look but I'm hoping it's a happy medium. Sorry about all the changes.

The Aspie Senses - Part 1

It's a well known fact that people on the spectrum often have sensory issues but it's probably less well known that these sensory issues can trigger both positive and negative feelings. Sensory issues are one of the major reasons why many aspies find it difficult to work. They are also a major contributor to shutdowns, and to a lesser extent, meltdowns.
The Sense of Hearing I tend to think that one of the main reasons why I've been successful in the workplace is because my own susceptability to sensory issues is reduced by comparison with other aspies. Being deaf has certainly given me much greater tolerance for the sorts of sounds which irritate my peers. I've been reading Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg's recent series of articles with great interest. Here is someone who is actually using earplugs to reduce her sensory issues - and she's not alone. There are many aspies doing exactly the same thing. Rachel even goes so far as to attend sign language classes to le…