Sunday, March 12, 2017

Sometimes Autism and/or Aspergers is very Detectable

Throughout my life, I've had people reacting to me in a fairly protective manner.

If I was a different type of person, I'd probably find it quite patronising but in my case, I don't mind it and I even find it helpful at times. I know a lot of people on the spectrum who react quite differently, greeting this type of treatment with anger.

Getting frustrated with this treatment is more or less the same as being a feminist and being frustrated with men who open doors for you. You may find it offensive but the people who are doing these things for you generally mean positive things. 

How are we detectable?

When I was younger, I used to assume that people knew about my hearing loss and were simply helping out. I remember having to say to my teachers at school, “I'm deaf, I'm not dumb”.

Recently it's begun to dawn on me that this isn't deafness, it's not even knowledge of my place on the autism spectrum.

It's simply the “vibes” that I put out. The social ineptitude, my poor co-ordination and my introverted body language.

Detectable body language

As I’m always repeating, “everyone on the autism spectrum is an individual”. Things which are particular for me may manifest quite differently for others - if at all. 

In my case, I came to the conclusion that people were adjusting differently for me during “boxing”..

I've been doing kickboxing once or twice per week for the past four months. Prior to that I did three years of karate so I'm no stranger to contact sports. In also quite a tall person and at forty seven it's safe to say that I don't look like a kid anymore.

Last week I was boxing with someone who was obviously pretty good and someone else who was clearly a beginner. None of us had spoken to each other prior to the boxing so the only clues that we had about each other were from observation.

I noticed that the inexperienced boxer was often missing his cues or hitting with less than perfect form. Mine was better but of course, the experienced boxer was extremely good. What was interesting though was the that the experienced boxer started to help me out, giving me cues, tips and nods while he ignored our very inexperienced companion.

I’ve also noticed, over the weeks that I’ve been doing boxing, the instructor has been much more encouraging and interacting with me than with my peers. I’ve noticed this in other classes at the gym and in other areas of life itself.

There’s something in my body language that says that I'm naive or perhaps “different”. I don’t know what it is but I know for sure that it’s there. 

2 comments:

Nashama Mohamed said...

I guess I'm one of those Aspies who are quite surprised when people detect my Asperger's. Because I always assume the general population do not know of Asperger's (I'm living in Asia). But it's a pleasant surprise.

Wonderful boxing metaphor, btw.

John Hobson said...

I am a computer programmer, part of a team of nine. With the exception of our boss, all of us are Aspies, some more severe than others. We are generally left to ourselves, where we are noted for turning out excellent software in remarkably short periods of time. As my boss's boss said to me once, "You guys may seem odd to some people here, but as long as you keep up churning out the programs, no one who knows really cares." I'm still trying to figure if it's a compliment or not.